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Many books have been written for those suffering from depression, but what if you're suffering becuase someone you love is depressed? Research shows that if you are close to a depressed person, you are at a much higher risk of developing problems yourself, including anxiety, phobias, and even a kind of contagious depression.
In this authoritative and compassionate book, psychologists Laura Epstein Rosen and Cavier Francisco Amador explain the mechanisms of depression that can cause communication breakdown, increase hostility, and ultimately destroy relationships. Through compelling real-life stories and step-by-step advice, the authors teach concrete methods that you and your loved one can use to protect yourselves and your relationship from depression's impact. Drawing on their own innovative research, the give sensitive guidance about how to recognize your needs, how to provide the best kind of support, and how to encourage the depressed person to seek treatment. Whether you are the partner, parent, friend, or child of a depressed person, you'll find this book and invaluable companion in you journey back to health.
- Sales Rank: #296004 in Books
- Published on: 1997-09-18
- Released on: 1997-09-18
- Original language: English
- Number of items: 1
- Dimensions: 8.44" h x .80" w x 5.50" l, .51 pounds
- Binding: Paperback
- 262 pages
- When Someone You Love is Depressed: How to Help Your Loved One Without Losing Yourself
From Library Journal
Feeling overburdened by your elderly depressed mother? Or maybe you're a parent worried about your withdrawn son. In either instance, this latest title from Rosen, director of family therapy at Columbia Presbyterian Medical Center, can help. Rosen's work is not as much about the causes and symptoms of depression as about how depression affects relationships. The author's ultimate goal is to help readers learn strategies to counter interaction problems, and she succeeds in this attempt. This empowering title will help readers and their loved one to speed their recovery and to safeguard the relationship against the weight of depression. Every chapter provides step-by-step guidelines for countering the negative effects of depression; special circumstances such as substance abuse or suicidal inclinations are also addressed. This is a solid purchase for all psychology collections.?Marty Dean Evensvold, Magnolia P.L., Tex.
Copyright 1996 Reed Business Information, Inc.
From Booklist
Those unfortunate souls who suffer from clinical depression experience extended periods of bleakness so intense it can render them unable to function. But other victims of this disease include the spouses, families, and friends of the depressed, and it is for them that psychologists Rosen and Amador have written this hopeful and empowering guide. When a loved one is afflicted with depression, it is not uncommon for those around them to feel anger, frustration, and despair. Physical ailments are common, too. After showing how to recognize depression in someone else, the authors discuss ways for friends and family to safeguard their own mental and physical health while aiding the depressed person. One key is to appreciate the inevitable communication problems between depressed people and others and to then work through this difficulty. Throughout, the message is that self-education leads to positive change. Brian McCombie
Review
Peter Kramer author of Listening to Prozac Doctors Rosen and Amador perfrom a valuable service by posing the important questions: How do you cope with depression when it intrudes on an intimate relationship? Their answers contain pratical wisdom that will allow readers to make concrete decisions affecting their own well-being and that of someone they love.
Herbert Pardes, M.D. Dean of the Faculty of Medicine and Vice President of Health Sciences, Columbia University College of Physicians and Surgeons A wonderfully sensitive book of benefit to the many perople in this country who suffer from the depression their families, loved ones, and friends experience. Its compassion along with its pratical problem-solving suggestions will make it invaluable.
Most helpful customer reviews
51 of 58 people found the following review helpful.
Simple minded
By A Customer
Someone I care for has just gone into a major clinical depression so I've been reading everything I could get my hands on to understand both him and the impact on me and our relationship. Of all the books I've read, this one was least helpful. Perhaps if I'd just hatched out of an egg and had no experience with life, it might give me information I didn't already have from living every day. It is so simple-minded, condescending and addresses the obvious so blandly - I felt it was a total waste of money. Anne Sheffield's book on Surviving when They're Depressed was a godsend - as was Terence Real's on men's depression. This one - gave me nothing at all. I don't usually slam things but this was useless in my opinion.
12 of 15 people found the following review helpful.
Somewhat helpful, but doesn't deliver what subtitle promises
By K. A. Kaiser
This is a good resource, but a bit repetitive and not as user friendly as I would like. When dealing with a major depressive, you don't have the energy to wade through a lot of this book. A structure with "key info" and "in-depth knowledge", allowing the reader to get the most important information up front then go back for the details would be easier to use.
Ultimately, I wanted more focus on ME, the person who cares about a someone who is depressed, and less on the depressed person. There are a lot of good books out there for the depressed person. My expectations of this book were to have concrete ways to not "catch" the "contagious depression", to not "lose myself" as the subtitle suggests. After reading the book, I don't see how my interactions with my two majorly depressed friends over the last year could have been handled much differently. And I did catch their depression, and I did lose myself for a time. So while I feel more educated about depression in general, I still am looking for more and better ideas for protecting myself while still helping my loved ones.
26 of 27 people found the following review helpful.
eye-opening to my own problems with his depression
By A Customer
My lover has recently recognised that he suffers from depression and sought treatment for it. This book helped me to acknowledge and recognise many of my own strong emotional feelings, doubts and problems of the past months, that only now I'm realising were partly or wholly related to his depression and our inability to communicate about it without becoming overly emotional. It especially stresses the way that these reactions to depression are not only normal, but that you can put them to your benifit in the fight against depression. It stresses that suffering from someone else's depression is normal and that the solution is in working together, being more intimate and communicating better, rather than to think of giving up. It gives many tips and eyeopeners and things to hold on to when trying to change things, and stresses the power of communication. It does not have all the answers, but tries to make you stronger to find answers together. It gave me hope and reassured me about the strenght of our relation.
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